In case you’re just turning your attention to the Internet, the big story of the day is “MEGAN FOX JOINS TWITTER!”
Yeah, it’s pretty exciting…
The actress has jumped on the Twitterland bandwagon (finally) under the name “@MeganFox,” from which she will share her 140 character thoughts to her growing number of followers. Her first tweets were to deny a death hoax, admit that she was “late to the party,” and share a photo of her life-size R2D2. And, while her Twitter-performance thus far has been lackluster, we have high hopes for Megan moving forward.
Here are five things that we hope Megan uses her Twitter account to tweet about in the coming months:
5. To Share a Family Beach Trip Photo That is Actually Just Megan Fox Being Hot in a Bikini: “Hey guys, check out my beautiful family and not my scantily clad made-for-rampant-sex body.” Sure thing, Megan. Whatever you say!
4. To Pick a Celeb Twitter Feud With Someone, Not Necessary LeAnn Rimes: For a social media rookie, a celebrity feud is an absolute must when navigating the new world of hashtags and handles. We only suggest LeAnn because she’s an easy target.
3. To Show Off Her Second Baby Bump, Just Not Right Away: We love seeing Megan Fox in the role of “sexy mom,” but we also love her in the role of “sexy blockbuster babe.” She has no projects in production on her IMDb page; the mere thought brings a sad face to clamoring Fox fans everywhere. Someone get this girl a movie deal already!
2. To Share a New Tattoo Twitpic, Hopefully Somewhere Close Enough to Her Chest Line So That We Get Some Cleavage Action: We suspect that her son, Noah Shannon Green, born on September 27, will be the inspiration on the new body art. A “Noah” script inked on her porcelain skin can’t be too far away.
1. To Announce a ‘Jonah Hex’ Spinoff That Removes the ‘Jonah Hex’ Part and Focuses on Megan in a Corset and Lingerie: Like you went to see that movie for Josh Brolin anyway…