Doritos To Unveil “Doritos For Ladies” Against All Logic

Joe Welkie
Doritos will launch a new chip specifically designed for women
(Photo: AdWeek)

Finally, the world has all it has been longing for. No longer will women feel discriminated against by potato chip manufacturers. They will no longer feel the brunt of sexism from Big Chip. All these wrongs have been righted because Doritos will launch a new chip specifically designed for women.

Doritos will launch a new chip specifically designed for women

That’s right, Doritos is finished with making chips that are intended only for men to eat, which, apparently, regular Doritos are. These new chips will feature a softer, more chewable texture for sensitive, delicate ladies.

What could possibly be the reason for this? Well, let the CEO of Pepsi (the company that owns Doritos), Indra Nooyi, explain everything to you:

Doritos will launch a new chip specifically designed for women

“When you eat out of a flex bag — one of our single-serve bags — especially as you watch a lot of the young guys eat the chips, they love their Doritos, and they lick their fingers with great glee, and when they reach the bottom of the bag they pour the little broken pieces into their mouth, because they don’t want to lose that taste of the flavor, and the broken chips in the bottom,” Nooyi told Freakonomics. “Women would love to do the same, but they don’t. They don’t like to crunch too loudly in public. And they don’t lick their fingers generously and they don’t like to pour the little broken pieces and the flavor into their mouth.”

Doritos will launch a new chip specifically designed for women

Unsuprisingly, this concept has been mocked, destroyed and roasted on social media. Several articles have been written about how stupid this new idea is, and the backlash may cause the company to backtrack on the release of these gendered snacks.

In fact, Pepsi already released a statement about the outrage they may have caused with these snacks.

“The reporting on a specific Doritos product for female consumers is inaccurate. We already have Doritos for women – they’re called Doritos, and they’re enjoyed by millions of people every day. At the same time, we know needs and preferences continue to evolve and we’re always looking for new ways to engage and delight our consumers.”

Doritos will launch a new chip specifically designed for women

At least we all know where Piers Morgan stands on the situation…

Yikes. Calm down, Piers. It’s not that serious, buddy.

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