New Bracelet Urges You to Skip Coffee & ‘Wear Your Caffeine’ Instead

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(Photo: OBSEV / Joule Cafffeine Bracelet)

If you needed any more proof that caffeine is a drug, look no further than the Joule Caffeine Bracelet.

It’s the same as a nicotine patch, but for like, caffeine.

In serious wtf news, a crowd-funding campaign has been created for a caffeinated bracelet that mimics the benefits of drinking coffee, without actually having to drink coffee. According to the Toronto-based company, the bracelet delivers caffeine straight into your blood stream through a small patch found on the inside of the band. Once your wrist comes into contact with the patch, the caffeine is immediately absorbed through your skin.
 

While the absorption of caffeine through a patch on your wrist sounds super gross and invasive, makers of the Joule bracelet say the transdermal administration (a fancy term for skin absorption) is a safe and natural process.

The purpose of the caffeine-inducing bracelet is to “free you from the horrors of drinking coffee,” which include negative side effects such as the jitters, spending too much money at Starbucks, and yellow-stained teeth. One patch for the Joule Bracelet contains roughly the same amount of caffeine as one cup of coffee, and is said to have no side effects due to its four-hour disbursement process.

No offense, but I’d rather do so many other things before spending money on theis bracelet. I’d rather give my money to a huge corporation such as Starbucks and still enjoy my coffee, with yellow teeth and all. I’d also rather buy one of those sketchy convenience store caffeine pills and suffer from a crash than get caffeine administered from a bracelet. 

For those who are interested, a Joule starter kit retails for $29 and includes 30 caffeine patches. A 30-patch refill costs $27. Currently, Joule has been backed by 217 people and is at 86% of their $15,000 goal.