For years now, Pizza Hut has been at the forefront of ever-evolving pizza base technology.
Stuffed crust, no crust, hot dog crust, burger crust – basically, Pizza Hut likes to play with crusts, and takes every available opportunity to squeeze something into this, traditionally the most boring element of the classic pizza formula.
Now, the company is at it again, with a brand new type of crust that some may love, while others may find utterly repulsive – it all depends on how much you like drinking melted cheese.
The Ultimate Cheesy Crust Pizza is pretty much just cheese. The crust is shaped into little doughy pots, which are then filled up with five different kinds of cheese. These then melt while the pizza is cooking, so you have the opportunity to guzzle a thick, gooey lump of several different dairy products all rolled into one.
Just as a warning, eating one of these pizzas near a vegan or lactose intolerant person is pretty much a declaration of war.
There’s no real way of knowing why anyone at Pizza Hut thought that we’d all appreciate the opportunity to drink five kinds of melted cheese when finishing each slice of pizza. It sounds awfully like this pie would be genuinely difficult to eat for anyone unaccustomed to consuming so much dairy all at once.
That said, the selection of cheeses in the mix are certainly pretty tasty. There’s mozzarella, Provolone, white cheddar, Asiago, and Fontina, which under any other circumstances would sound amazing, but not as a brief interlude between consuming large quantities of yet more cheese on top of a pizza.
If you hate yourself enough to want to try this abomination, it’s on sale now, but only for a limited time. There’s also a range of blankets, mugs, and socks that accompany the release, just in case you’re in need to an easy way to signify to your loved ones that you desperately need an intervention.