So This Is What a No-Hands Pizza Eating Contest Looks Like

Bryan Brandom
(Photo: Getty Images)

This past weekend, eventgoers at Oozefest in Santa Ana, California, consumed enough cheese to last a giant rat like Master Splinter a lifetime.

The Foodbeast-sponsored event provided cheese-loving participants with an orgy of cheese pulls and every manner of consuming the delicious dairy product—like Sgt. Pepperoni's Pizza Store's "Balls Deep," a meatball wrapped in cheesy pizza then deep-fried.

The festival ended how all festivals—regardless of theme—should end: with an eating contest.

Seeing as how Oozefest is a cheese-centric festival but not a cheese-centric festival in Wisconsin, instead of eating straight cheese, participants instead ate pizza, but with a catch: they couldn't use their hands.

Instead, contestants wrapped their arms behind their backs, but around the arms of a teammate, who reached in front and fed the eater with his or her hands.

After about nine and a half minutes, a victor was declared so decisively that by the time he'd finished eating his own eight-slice pie, he started eating a slice from another contestant's plate while others were still on their third and fourth slices.