Lawyers Share Their Amazing “I Rest My Case!” Story
Being a lawyer is not easy. From dealing with frustrating clients to trying to stay sharp during long and difficult trials, lawyers face plenty of stress on a daily basis. On a good day, they may think they have a victory in the bag, but a crushing loss is always a possibility.
The best cases are the ones that seem to practically resolve themselves. Whether a simple end to a trial is orchestrated by a crummy witness, a terrible defendant or an awful lawyer, some “I rest my case!” conclusions are just too perfectly wrapped up.
In some scenarios, clients talk themselves into their own graves, or witnesses manage to discredit themselves with a few words. Lying, dirty, and inexperienced lawyers can sink a case into the ground as well.
However, there are times when these scenarios are taken to the extreme, and those trying to defend themselves end up completely incriminating themselves in the process. These hysterical and facepalm-worthy tales will have you wondering just how far human stupidity can go.
Would you be able to keep it together if you witnessed one of these hilarious legal screw-ups?
Don’t forget to check the comment section below the article for more interesting stories!
#1 I Wish We Could See His Face
The opposing counsel decided that I had coached my witness and gave him lines to repeat. He accused him of lying. He asked the witness if he spoke to me before he testified and the witness said he had. The attorney looked like he thought he had me.
He then asked the witness what I told him and the witness looked him dead in the eye, saying: “The first thing he told me was: tell the truth no matter what.
He said the lawyer is never the one who goes to jail, and if I lie, I’m on my own.” The attorney looked like someone took the air out of him. Everyone in the courtroom simultaneously looked at me. It was the only time I’ve smirked or laughed in court.
I wanted to put my feet up on the table like I was Vincent LaGuardia Gambini.
Credit: Reptar4President
#2 You (Literally) Walked Into That One, Pal
I was prosecuting some kid. He had an “anti-social behavior order,” which meant that he was not supposed to go to a certain street. He had pleaded not guilty on the basis that he had not been there. I opened my cross-examination by holding up a map and pointing at the street.
I said to him, “You went here, didn’t you?” He said, “Yes.” In England, we don’t say “I rest my case.” Instead, I looked up at the bench, said, “No further questions,” and sat down. It might not seem cool, but I got the defendant to admit the offense with one question.
That never happens!
Credit: unemployabler
#3 Smooth, But Not Smooth Enough
A guy in a divorce case transferred money to the “Equity Preservation Corporation.” I looked at the corporate filing—there were only two shareholders. Knowing who they were, I asked ab0ut them during my cross-examination. He denied ever knowing them. I then asked about them by name.
He admitted they were his parents. He slipped up and that case was officially closed.
Credit: wasabiverse
#4 So, You’re Just An Idiot
I represented a company that was sued for breach of contract by a former independent contractor. The dude basically alleged that my client wasn’t paying him correctly in accordance with the contract.
During his deposition, the dude admitted that he never reviewed any documents to make sure his allegations were true, nor did review his complaint before filing it. He had no idea whether or not my client actually failed to pay him in accordance with the contract.
Basically, he told me that he was suing my client because he didn’t think their agreement was fair (even though he agreed to the terms when he signed the contract). The kicker is that he admitted he OWED money to my client.
At arbitration, he tried to flip his story, giving a testimony that was the exact opposite of his deposition. So, I whipped out his transcript and undermined his testimony bit by bit. Needless to say, I won that case.
Credit: ellewoodswannabe16
