Life

Petty Acts of Revenge That Seriously Draw the Line

Petty Acts of Revenge That Seriously Draw the Line June 16, 2022Leave a comment

They say that revenge is a dish best served cold, but it can also be fantastic when served white hot, with delicious passion. Here are some truly spectatular true life examples of incredibly petty acts of revenge that taught nasty people a lesson or two.

Cleanliness is Next to Godliness

Pixabay

I used to work at Best Buy in Geek Squad and usually the people working the closing shifts had to clean up their departments and such. We had just gotten a new manager who was an outside hire from Circuit City.

He was trying to flex his management powers by being meticulous about cleaning during closing duties asking things like "Did you clean UNDER the registers and Windex and dust etc" about every little thing.

A buddy of mine I was working with and I started our closing duties a little early since the store was pretty dead that night in order to be able to leave at a reasonable hour. We pretty much wrapped up 15 minutes after the store closed so we got the manager to do a walkthrough so we could leave.

He's looking around and everything seems to be in order until he looks behind some signage on a shelf and runs his finger through picking up some dust. He has this evil grin on his face and lets out a little weasely laugh and says "Looks like you guys still have some work to do."

My buddy and I looked at each other and we both just knew what had to be done. We cleaned the entire department top to bottom, inside and out. Every drawer was emptied, dusted, wiped down, brochures organized.

Every computer in the back was moved and the shelves were dusted and wiped, floors were vacuumed twice, top stock was neatly arranged, every inch of the department was gone over with a fine tooth comb, twice in some spots just to take longer.

10pm turned into midnight, everyone else was long gone except for us 3. He was looking weary and tired. Midnight turned into 2am and we were still going at it when he finally came out of the office red eyed and exhausted and said "Guys, let's go." "But we still haven't dusted under the counters and..."

"Its fine, lets go." Buddy and I took our sweet time gathering our things and clocking out. We both were also off the next day and jerk manager had to be in early for a conference call so it made it all that much better.

Every time he was the closing manager after that night he never gave us trouble again, simply asking us if we were ready to go when the store closed. Justice prevails. Story credit: Reddit / RoflCopter726

Like a Bad Penny

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Whenever I was at work I would keep an eye on some of the coins I had in my till drawer that weren't "legal tender" in my country. I would then give these to customers who were jerks to me in their change. Muahaha. Story credit: Reddit / ScarletRhi

Flip-Flopping

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I had a drunk guy wake me up and try to fight me one night in a hostel. I was cleaning up in the morning and he was asleep on the couch. I took his flip flops and put them in the lost property. So petty, I know. Story credit: Reddit / gentlemanofleisure

Watercolors

Pixabay

When I was 10, we had to paint birds for art, I was pretty good at art but a girl copied my exact one, even though we had to do different ones and I was not pleased.

So while we were cleaning up paint brushes, (the painted birds were placed nearby), I put her painting in the sink with the tap running, pretended it accidentally fell in there and walked away like nothing happened. I think she got the message. Story credit: Reddit / 1470258369

Harsh But Fair

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When I was in high school I went on vacation with family and bought my then girlfriend earrings to surprise her with when i got back. I came back to her introducing me to her new boyfriend and me subsequently being kicked to the curb.

2 years later we got to talking over facebook and I initiated a meet up. She told me she had feelings for me again and I responded with "cool, I'm late for dinner, talk to you later." BEST MASHED POTATOES EVER WERE HAD. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Egg McMuffin

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I have high school kids that park on my street every school day. Occasionally they will sit out there and smoke cigarettes, which is fine.. They are largely respectful of my property.

I noticed this one kid always threw his McDonalds trash in my yard- I have caught him doing it a few times. Now I egg his car everytime I see trash on the ground. So far, I have done it twice, but haven't seen his car for a few days. Maybe he gave up parking on my street.

Yes, I am 32 and egg a 16 year old kid's car. Story credit: Reddit / Pvt_Donkey

Game Over

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My brother for some reason HATES using his laptop in his room even though he has a desk. He comes downstairs to sit in the lounge next to my room and games until really late at night with his friends (always talking really loud/yelling into his headset) while I'm trying to work/study/sleep.

He utterly refuses to go to his room when I ask, claiming that he has every right to be there because I "don't own downstairs". He is in a competitive gaming clan, often competing in Tribes: Ascend competitions with cash prizes.

I have written a script that turns the internet off for 5 minutes every 10 minutes. Just enough time for him to get into a game and then have his connection drop and then repeat 10 minutes later. All night. Story credit: Reddit / dem0n

Down the Drain

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At my previous job I worked with a "story topper". You know, she did it way better, cooler, and sooner than everyone else. She even started using my stories. I was very irritated. I started taking a pen or two a week from her desk. Sometimes it was some little doo-dad.

I would casually snatch an item then take it to the mens bathroom where I would put it into a hole near the sink pipes. It sounds stupid, but it made me feel like a rebel. I wish I could be there when they have to repair that sink and find all of her supplies in that wall. Story credit: Reddit / moonlitshroom

Shower Surprise

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One time my brother ate my last popsicle, and I was really annoyed about it so I waited until he was in the shower and took all of the towels out of the bathroom and hid them. He was all wet and there was NOTHING he could do about it. Myeheheheheheh! Story credit: Reddit / SuperPowers97

Selective Stupidity

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I work in retail because I need the health insurance, but a LOT of customers seem to believe I work where I do because I'm an idiot. And the second something like that comes out of their mouths ("could you actually learn how to do your job CORRECTLY!?

Some of us have places to be, y'know, jobs that actually matter.'') I become the stupidest cashier you will EVER have. My idiocy knows no bounds. What's that? You brought in an expired coupon, and when I scan it and tell you it's not valid, I'M the stupid one? Huh. Okay then.

I guess I need to call over a manager to okay every single one of your coupons, you snotty twat. Good thing you weren't in a rus- oh wait, you're gonna be late to your doctor's appointment? That's too bad, because I accidentally just deleted everything I rung up! Gotta start over!

Note: I only do this to customers that insult me first, it's never unprovoked stupidity, and I don't do it if there's a line behind them, it wouldn't be right to mess with innocent shoppers. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Saving the Day with Lawyers

Pixabay

There's a bar at the end of my street, and my mom liked to go there to watch people play pool. She didn't drink, she would just sit there and watch and drink Diet Coke. Apparently, she struck up a conversation with one of the guys one day, and he kissed her on the cheek and then played a great game of pool.

So after that, he'd kiss her on the cheek before he played pool. For some reason, the guy who ran the bar didn't like my mom and banned her from the bar. When I was in college, I was on a road trip and I saw a Canadian bar chain with the same name and logo.

I looked it up when I got home, and sure enough that bar chain had been in business for longer than the bar had been using that name and logo in the US. So I emailed the chain with pictures of the bar and all the info for the bar.

They emailed me back to thank me and forwarded it to the legal department. Six months later, the bar had a new owner and a new name. Story credit: Reddit / Smerps

Puke Solution

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It was my first day back in my 3rd grade class after being out sick for nearly a week with the stomach flu. I started feeling sick during story time after lunch and raised my hand to ask to go to the bathroom, teacher told me to put my hand down, and shushed me when I tried to protest.

Cue this happening 3 more times or so and after the last one I just proceeded to vomit all over the classroom floor, which was carpeted. Story credit: Reddit / realgenius13

That's What Big Brothers Are For

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One time at a boy scout meeting (I was probably 10 at the time) my sister was there cause my mom was really involved. We were all playing a game and some kid implied that my sister was inferior cause she was a girl.

Later on that kid was playing foosball and from the other side of the table I rammed one of the rods for operating the little guys into his stomach as hard as I could. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Truly Petty

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This guy I considered somewhat of a friend started dating my ex a week after we broke up. Jokes on him because I still haven't accepted his friend request on facebook. Story credit: Reddit / OGBrownboy

Movie Candy Ain't Cheap

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I work in a movie theatre, and anytime some rude parent is being a jerk, I ask loudly if they would like to add any candy to their order, knowing their kids are going to beg them for it. Story credit: Reddit / limecat

Windshield Surprise

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When my daughter was about 5 months old, I made an excursion to the store to get necessities. I was tired and had my baby with me. I patiently waited for one of those "parent with child" parking spots and acknowledge the mom loading up with a tired smile and wave.

As she pulled her minivan out of her spot this OLD lady in a jaguar whips around me and into the spot. I was beyond infuriated, I just sat there shocked. So I pulled in to another spot and waited. Waited for my daughter to fill up her diaper. I left the old lady a dirty diaper under her windshield wiper. Story credit: Reddit / klairedee

Thug Life

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My teacher was being a total jerk so I switched the caps on all the sharpies. I didn't choose the thug life. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Pizza Party

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My former employer is a well known pizza joint that treats its employees terribly. I left and took another job and for a couple years afterwards I will still make large online orders for pickup that I never intend to get. Story credit: Reddit

Spit Attack

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This lady was speeding through the parking lot at my apartment and nearly hit some dude walking his dog a little ways up from me. Being the classy gal that I am, when her car zoomed by me, I reared back like a cobra, hawked up the biggest, greenest wad of phlegm and horked it right onto her windshield.

I had gotten into my car to go run errands when she comes flying back around the corner, slams her car in park, and starts advancing screaming, "DID YOU SPIT ON MY CAR?!" Instead of looking incredulous or confused and dissolving the situation, I blew her a kiss...

I drove off with her wailing and chasing me down the street trying to punch my window in. One of my finer moments. Story credit: Reddit / CowtheHankDog

The Worst Pain Imaginable

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When I was in preschool, this kid Luke told the teacher I was scribbling while we were drawing. I put legos in his shoes. Story credit: Reddit / Strixis

When Life Gives You Lemons

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I work on a bar, and any customer who is a jerk to me, I fill their glass with ice so they get less drink, or give them a small piece of lemon. Conversely anyone who is nice gets doubles for the price of singles and the largest lemon slices. Story credit: Reddit / scottynewcastle

Honesty is the Best Revenge

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When I was working part time at a grocery store they cheesed me off. 6 months after I stopped work there I was thinking about my treatment during my time at the store and decided to report them for multiple health code and building violations.

Bear in mind that these were not made up allegations, but I am sure that they were shut down for a while because of it. Story credit: Reddit / The_Lollipop_King

ID Hunting

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I used to work at Subway. We would always have this regular customer come in and complain about every little thing such as "not enough tomatoes on my sandwich", etc.

I knew she was a regular and I knew who she was, but everytime she would come she would only bring in her check book, not her purse.

I, being the model employee, would purposely make her go back out to her car for her driver's license (which she would dig for for ten minutes), and come up with 2 phone numbers while her sandwich got cold. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Roadblock

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Ah, this happened just yesterday. I was driving on a side street (speed limit of 40 mph but there are a lot of school zones, so it is frequently 25 mph) and there was a crazy driver coming up behind me, weaving through traffic, speeding, ignoring school zones, and just being a terrible driver, all in all.

I am driving next to a truck, and I look over at him, he nods his head , and I do the same, and when this guy comes up behind us, we go the same speed (the speed limit) until we hit the highway (about 5 miles). The guy behind us was raging in the mirror and weaving back and forth.

Looking back, I feel kinda bad, but we have had a lot of accidents lately, where people are ignoring the school zones and kids have been hit crossing the street. So I don't feel that bad. Story credit: Reddit / nolooking

Marking Territory

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I hated my old room mate with a passion. She constantly tried to get my girlfriend to leave me so they could go out clubbing and meet guys together. She would eat all of the food we purchased, but would flip out if we ever touched anything she had bought.

I wasn't allowed to have my friends over EVER period, but she could bring over whoever she wanted whenever she wanted. She use to think her 10 week old puppy was peeing on her pile of clean clothes. It wasn't the puppy. Story credit: Reddit / MACandSteez

This One is Taken

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Last night, I went to my boyfriend's for Halloween. He's in student accommodation, and one of the girls on his floor has developed quite the desire for him. She doesn't seem to consider my existence in all this, and quite simply, I wanted to show her that why yes, he does have a girlfriend.

So, even though everyone else was also free, I asked her to take a cute couple-y photo of us in our costumes. To sorta.. drive home the point that he's mine. Not that bad, but still quite petty. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Reverse TP'd

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My brother's girlfriend had annoyed me by criticizing some of my life choices and then demanding I apologize to her, so I went to the bathroom while she was over and used all but the last 2 squares of toilet paper when I knew she would be using the toilet soon.

Very petty, and quite possibly the most passive aggressive thing I've ever done. Story credit: Reddit / shriekingmauve

Odd Flavor

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Had a coworker who would eat people's food, even leftovers, out of the work fridge. We put cat droppings in a burrito and he didn't realize something was weird till about 3 bites in. Story credit: Reddit / Jmersh

Going Too Far

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I rubber-banded a co-workers desk drawer so it would slam shut when he opened it. I intended to annoy him. I did not intend on breaking his finger. Score for me? Story credit: Reddit / sean488

Web of Lies

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An ex-friend of mine is a very talented musician and he wanted me to design him a website. So I did just that. I, being what I thought was being a good friend, quoted him $500 for the whole thing PLUS 2 years of free updates. (Anyone who does any kind of web design for a living, knows that this is basically a gift with a silk bow.)

I paid for all the hosting and the domain up front for 2 years, designed the whole thing and uploaded his website. Then I tried collecting my money and that didn't pan out very well. He kept saying how his shows hadn't done so well or his car had broken down.

After 6 months of trying to collect money and being out roughly $200 that I had put a down for the hosting and domain fees, I finally decided to take his site down. The domain is mine for another 5 years.

He didn't even notice it was down until months later when I got a phone call at 3 am and several threats via text. Once my girlfriend read them, she kind of panicked and made me go to the police to file a harassment complaint.

He tried to contact me about a year ago and apologized for making threats at me and offered to pay me to get his website up and running but, once again, asked if I could do the work up front and he was "good for the money"... Because I hadn't heard that one before... Haven't heard from him since. Story credit: Reddit / ISlangKnowledge

Gotta Go Slow

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I was working in the customer service booth at my local grocery store. It was my second day on the job alone, and I had JUST opened the booth. One guy comes up and I start helping him put his Western Union order through, it usually takes 5 minutes.

About 45 seconds after I start helping this guy, a woman comes up and IMMEDIATELY starts tapping her foot in impatience. Arms crossed, huffing, sighing, the whole deal. I just glance at her and keep doing my thing. I'm not going to mess up my order just because she's being impatient.

But then she starts being vocal about it. She glances at her watch and says to no one in particular "I'm REALLY in a hurry. Ugh." Then addresses me "Is there SERIOUSLY NO ONE ELSE TO HELP YOU?" I explained that no, it was just me. Mind you it's still just those two in line.

She asks the customer in front of her that I'm already helping if she can just get her business taken care of so she can leave. He just kinda says "Ok, whatever" so she pushes her way in front of him and thrusts her bill in my face.

I take it, set it down, and tell her she can wait until I finish helping the customer who was in front of her. Then again she rambles to no one in particular "I have to be in Parowan by 10! It takes at LEAST an hour! I'm going to be late! Ugh!" I finish with my customer (taking my sweet time) and start her transaction.

Turns out she wanted to pay a bill by check and I had never done it before, so I had to call someone over to help me. She continued to huff and puff while I took as much time as possible. I could have finished her transaction in less than 5 minutes, took at least 8 or 9. I hope she was late. Story credit: Reddit / Oddment_Tweak

Sharing is Caring

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When I was in high school, there was this guy who had a girl from three grades below that had a massive obsessive crush on him. She would even go with her mom and stalk him at his work place. Everyone in my grade knew about that girl and her obsession.

So one day I overheard that he had changed his number since she would not stop calling and texting him. SO one day he called me something really mean (I can't remember what anymore) so in the next period I asked one of his closest friends to lend me her phone cause I had forgotten mine at home and I needed to call my mom.

I went to the bathroom, looked for the guy's new number on the cellphone lent to me and texted another friend of mine: "This is the guy's new number, let "crazy girl" have it." I kid you not, when I returned from the bathroom, I sat in my desk and his phone rang.

He picked it up, then he realized it was her, threw his phone in the ground and started cursing and blaming his group of friends. Never had a clue I was the one who did it. I guess it was pretty petty, but I had fun that day. Story credit: Reddit / limecakes

Totally Deserved

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I was eating at a Mexican restaurant with my young cousin who is autistic. She has a hard time going in public, but I was trying to be nice and take her to eat and go see Dolphin Tale (she loves dolphins, like seriously).

There was a table next to us that was on their 2nd or 3rd pitcher for margaritas, and they were being very loud and crude. It was making my little cousin very noticeably uncomfortable, so I walked over to the table and very politely tried to explain the situation.

Before I could even finish, one of them dumped his water all over my feet and went back to talking like I had never been there. I got all mad, but didn't fight back. Before I walked back to my table, I noticed that there wasn't a sober driver in the group.

I left my cousin with my sister, stepped outside, and called my friend in town who is a cop. I explained the situation to him, told him what they were wearing, and got his help. They left the same time we did, and all piled up in a white SUV with the water dumping douchebag as the driver (perfect).

As soon as the car moved in reverse, my friend flew around the corner, put his lights on, and asked the driver to step out. DUI and license suspension for the driver, drunk in public for the rest. Maybe not so petty, but super satisfying. Story credit: Reddit / jmperson

Itchy

Pixabay

I used to have to do the family laundry, which meant carrying about 4 big garbage bags of laundry a few blocks to the laundromat every weekend. Once in a while, if an eye was not constantly kept on the dryer, someone would just dump all of our clothes on the floor and take the dryer that was in use because they did not feel like waiting.

When that happened to my family's laundry, I would throw a piece of fiberglass insulation into the stolen dryer. Story credit: Reddit / itburnsohgoditburns

Al Gore's Betrayal

Pixabay

When I was in 9th grade, a girl who was a year above and who had once been my friend began to harass me. She'd say mean things about me whenever I was in earshot, write mean things about me on her public blog and send me horrible emails. At one point, her and her sidekick tried to jump me.

I remembered that she had a big crush on Al Gore and I knew that she used Xanga religiously so I tried to log into her Xanga, using Al Gore as the password. Lo and behold, it worked.

I deleted every single entry she had written. She had her account for like two years and when she saw what had happened, she made a long post about how heartbroken she was. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Sugar Rush

Pixabay

Woman came into the frozen yogurt shop where I was working. She let her bratty kid run around. Mildly annoying, more annoying was that she let her kid disrespect and walk all over his grandma who was with them. She was also really rude and talked down to all my staff.

When she went to the bathroom the kid jumped up on the counter and stuck his hand in the toppings. So I gave him an entire cup full of M&M's. When she came back from the bathroom her kid was in a frenzy with the candy.

Boy was she mad, but the little monster went into a complete rage when she took the candy from him. It got so bad and shameful that she had to literally drag him out. Story credit: Reddit / cyu12

Cash is King

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I had a falling out with a housemate and decided to move out. He informed me that he would not take a check for the balance of money I owed him (final months rent, my share of the utilities, etc.). SO I paid him the $300 or so in cash.

A big pile of $1 bills, all crumpled and dumped on his counter during the lunch rush at the deli he owned. Made him count it out and write me a receipt. Story credit: Reddit / NowInOz

Fired for a Steak

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I once worked with a woman who accused me of doing something I didn't do, and I got fired for it because she was friends with the manager and the manager took her word over mine.

Ten years later, I went to 7-11 to talk to my friend who was the manager there, and I see that same woman working there. So when my manager friend and I went outside, I told him I'd buy him lunch and a case of beer if he fired her.

A week later, he told me that he wanted to go to dinner at Outback Steakhouse and a case of Labatt because he just fired that woman. Worth it. Story credit: Reddit / Smerps

Always Tip Your Waitress

Pixabay

Well this was several years ago when I was fresh out of high school. Previous to this day (several years prior) myself and some friends went out for pizza, and our one friend Frankie wouldn't pitch in for a tip. All we asked for was a dollar or two. He was the only one with a job and had a stack of 20's in his wallet.

I let him know I'd remember this and that he'd regret it. Well fast forward, we're at a concert in downtown Columbus, Ohio. It was for the NHL draft and they had a free Yellowcard concert for everyone. It was me, another friend, and Frankie.

Frankie didn't have any money and actually had to "borrow" a two liter of soda for the ride down from our friends house. We decide to go to a restaurant before the show started and ended up trying out BD's for the first time.

We sit down and Frankie so kindly asked if we'd at least buy him a drink because he was very thirsty. Our other friend had barely any money so he had to refuse. Frankie turned to me and with the biggest puppy dog eyes begs me for some money.

"Frankie… Remember a few years back when you wouldn't tip the nice waitress at Pizza Hut? I told you I would. So no, you can't have any money from me. If you wouldn't be such a jerk good things would happen to you. I would have bought you a meal, but no, you brought this upon yourself."

He was pretty mad at us the rest of the day, but I think our friend shared a Gatorade with him after the concert was over. Sweet sweet revenge. Story credit: Reddit / Fillyblunts

Red Revenge

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I work at subway, and if someone is rude to me, I give them the ends of the tomatoes. ha HA! Story credit: Reddit / ThePurplePlatypuses

Nice to Meat You

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My apartment neighbors are constantly complaining about supposed noise coming from my apartment. So after hearing enough of their whining I basically forced them to let me come inside and listen to what my music sounded like in their apartment. Turns out you can't hear anything.

So as time goes on I would find small pieces of uncooked meat on my back patio. After the third time, about a week ago, I was mad, so I picked the meat up and threw it on their back patio as hard as I could, hoping it would wake them up. It didn't. After checking the next day the meat had bounced off the corner of the wall and wrapped itself around their storage room doorknob.

Better luck could not have been possible. Turns out they never go on their patio, and as a result there is putrid one week old rotting meat on their door handle as I type this. Story credit: Reddit / [deleted]

Beer Goggles

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I was about 12 when we had our first dog. It was the cutest fluffiest little thing-we named him Sugar. My dad's girlfriend at the time was an alcoholic. Our puppy was only about 10 weeks when she thought it would be a great idea to let it outside without any supervision.

The poor little pup was run over by a car and was killed. She had one job- watch the puppy for 2 hours. No, she wasn't drunk when we left. Our family was devastated, my father even cried. This devil woman then proceeds to tell us she was too drunk and simply forgot the dog was outside.

A few weeks later I was still incredibly upset and angry. I went to the bathroom and noticed she had left her contacts in the bathroom. I opened the case and put soap in the contact lens solution. That morning as she put those contacts on I heard her cry out in pain.

She had irritated eyes for a week. I thought it was a small price to pay for killing my puppy. My father was a little upset but he had no proof of my wrongdoing. I finally disclosed what I had done drunkenly to my father on my 25th birthday.

We laughed and took a shot of tequila. That woman is out of our lives and we couldn't be happier. Story credit: Reddit / LaFemmeNat

Wish You Were Here!

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My sister in law is a pretty massive jerk, and she and her husband live far away, so when my husband's family does anything fun, or his parents take us anywhere, I'm always sure to text her about it. I always end it with 'wish you were here!' which is a total lie, but it makes me feel better. Story credit: Reddit / PopsicleJane14

The Dark Knight Rises

Warner Bros.

Once upon a time I was waiting for a plane and had gotten there about an hour early and staked out my comfy seat near the charging station. I got up to get some food and asked an elderly gentleman to watch my stuff (which was in the seat for me).

When I came back a woman and her brat were sitting in my seat and my stuff was just thrown on the floor, the elderly gent apologized and said that he said the seat was taken but the woman asserted that couldn't be done. Perturbed, I gathered my stuff and camped out elsewhere.

When the time to board came she went on with her kid and I got into line. Upon seeing where they were sitting on the plane I decided I had an idea. I sat directly in front of the woman and her son (who was like 6 but for whom she still had not purchased a ticket and had sit in her lap, to the annoyance of her aisle mates) and waited.

Once we had reached cruising altitude I took out my laptop and started watching Batman: The Animated Series. I suspected it would make the kid a tad rambunctious - craning his head over the seat to watch it too - what I did not expect was for him to kick his mother in the face during the endeavor.

Her nose was bleeding for the rest of the flight and one of the flight attendants thought it might be broken. Story credit: Reddit / DCdictator

Milk Switch

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I've noticed that the customers that are the biggest jerks are the ones who order skinny lattes or light frapps (I work at Starbucks). On bad days, I'll put whole milk in their drinks. Story credit: Reddit / TheSumOfAllSteers

Beep Beep

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When I'm mad at my brother I unplug his alarm clock because I know it's a pain to reset… that'll show him… Story credit: Reddit / lobphin

Surprise Spice

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I give out samples at grocery stores. If someone comes up to me and I say "hi" and they say nothing to me, 9 times out of 10 they will grab something really spicy.

So I don't tell them it's spicy, then when they turn around to look at me with a surprised, flustered look on their face, I just nod and smile devilishly. Story credit: Reddit / TheClassyRaptor

Meatball Mischief

Pixabay

One time, when I was about 10, a girl used to pick on me constantly in school. So when we did a cookery class I decided to strike like a pudgy cobra. Every time she looked away from her food, spaghetti and meatballs, I'd eat a meatball. I kept doing this until, on the last meatball, she caught me.

After yelling at me and asking what I was doing, I calmly said "the class should be glad, I saved them from having to eat your terrible food." Then she hit me in the face with a whisk. Story credit: Reddit / Ubernook

Smoosh!

Pixabay

When I was VERY little (like, 6yo or something, 29 now) I was at the dinner table with my brother (18 months younger than me) and he said something I didn't like (I can't remember what, it was over 20 years ago now!).

So I reached over, put my hand on the back of his head and rammed his stupid face into his dinner plate, covering his face in beans and tomato sauce. Just remembering it right now is making me crack up, and this particular incident still gets brought up every now and then. Story credit: Reddit / thatbloke83

Truly Petty

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Normally I always clear the leftover time after I use the microwave but when I'm mad at my husband I don't. Story credit: Reddit / sydler