Real Life Stories of Lawyers’ Dumbest Clients
Some people just don’t know when to plead the fifth. Here are some real life stories of legal clients who really should have listened to their lawyers’ advice, told by the lawyers themselves, who are just so tired of people hiring them and ruining their own cases by being utterly incompetent.
Fashion Crime
Wore a shirt that said “Natural Born Killer” on it to a hearing. For an assault charge.
I had him turn it inside out. He went down anyway, but at least it was for, you know, actually assaulting someone, rather than the shirt. Tortfeasor
Some People Never Learn
My all time favorite is a client I had who was charged with Driving Under the Influence (DUI), who wanted to challenge the charges on the grounds he didn’t think he was drunk and the tests was administered improperly…
Who appeared at his court hearings rip-roarin’ drunk…twice…and then, both times, he got into his car and tried to drive away…and BOTH TIMES, the police promptly stopped him, administered a breathalyzer and charged him with DUI and related offenses.
We didn’t win that case. CoJoetheLawyer
Bonus Confession
Told a client “don’t say anything to the police, wait until I get there.” Confesses to a crime he wasn’t being investigated for.
Double Booked
Not my client, but I was on the prosecutor’s side when a defendant failed to appear for court. His attorney can’t reach him, nobody know where he is, so we all sit there for about half an hour, until the judge gets sick of it and moves on with the docket.
We found out later that day that the defendant decided to rob a 7/11 the night before and was sitting in jail two counties over when he should’ve been in court.