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The Strangest People Seen Riding the Subway

The Strangest People Seen Riding the Subway July 7, 2020Leave a comment

New York City is full of millions of free thinkers, creative geniuses and downright weirdos, all of whom ride the subway on occasion. If you're taking the tube, you might see a celebrity or costumed performer fighting for a seat just like anyone else.

And, because of New York's new laws allowing dogs on the subway, but only those that are able to fit into a bag, many adorable pictures have sprung up of sleepy puppies and their frazzled owners just trying to make their commute.

Twinning with Public Transportation

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This guy sure knows how to blend in! No, this isn't a floating head and disembodied arm. Look closer, this is extreme color coordination. You might not have heard, but bus seat camouflage is all the rage. Just ask this happy, dapper public transportation patron and he'll tell you.

New From IKEA: Dogi

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I'm horrible at putting together IKEA furniture... I hope this Dogi kit comes with the Allen wrench in the bag! Just unpack, assemble and feed Swedish meatballs for a convenient, do-it-yourself companion. The no-muss no-fuss packaging ensures a poop-free subway ride back to your eclectic yet tasteful apartment dwelling.

The Airbnb Ad Said 'Subway Adjacent'

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The Airbnb we rented said "subway adjacent," but we never dreamed it would be so convenient! The phone was right next to the bed and the bathroom was just a short walk up some stairs and down a dark hallway next to the news stand. We were awakened every 15 minutes by the express train, which was so romantic. The rats were exciting too, definitely staying here when we visit NYC again!

Triplets Get Comfy

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The cool thing about being triplets is you will always have a place to lay your head. Even when that place is your brother's head. Or your other brother's arm. You'll have a lot of places to lay your head, actually.

Heading to a Big Tennis Match

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When you are a tennis player, size matters. Never missing a shot is easy when you have the Goliath Mach 5. You'll barely have to move, this racket practically serves for you.

Open Carry

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Now here are a couple of friendly guys. Making friends with strangers is easy! Champagne and gin isn't the most popular alcohol combination, but these two gents aren't worried about dumb rules.

Fresh Pizza Fail

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Sometimes nice people offer samples of local delicacies on the train. This sleepy young lady with mismatched nail polish was so keen to share. So glad the paper is protecting the pizza from the subway floor. It's still good!

Just a Grass Man

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Just file this under environmentally conscious style. My gardener once told me that all the grass he cuts is wasted in the garbage and someone could make bank by reusing it. This grass man obviously had the same idea. Vogue Magazine should get up on this eco friendly couture, just look out around dogs!

Sweet Childhood Memory or Papier-Mâché Nightmare?

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I loved "Where The Wild Things Are" as a kid, but this is too much. To keep an eye on their child, these monstrous parents have to ominously glare down at him, much to the surprise of their fellow subway passengers.

Table for One

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Is he eating off a tiny ironing board? Did he consciously match the table color with the seat? What kind of sushi is he eating? There are so many questions for the underground fine dining enthusiast and so few answers.

Nightmare Fuel

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Chuckie and his lovely bride are on their way to Target to pick up a couple of things they need for a fun night on the town. But the businessman next to them is obviously not ok with the seating arrangement.

This is Not a Hat

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While reading a Wikipedia article on French surrealist painters, this professional psychic spontaneously became a René Magritte painting.

Man, Fed Up with Subway Storage Options, Creates Table Head

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This brilliant designer had an epiphany to solve the long standing problem of where to put your stuff on a crowded train. "If only there was a storage option attached to my very own head," he thought. He is currently accepting investment capitol and hair gel donations.

Dog in Bag

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Due to new rules on the New York City subway system, dog in a bag is a classic accessory for the modern man on the go. Added features include accidental poop, disappearing sandwiches and lots of slobber.

Clown Graffiti

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A notorious birthday clown graffiti artist ballon-bombed a local subway train on Tuesday prompting the anti-graffiti task force to open an investigation. The smirky dude in the foreground reading a biography of Marcel Marceau was absolutely not the culprit.

Good Behemoth

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This is a huge dog on a subway train, sitting like a person. He was unaccompanied and was seen exiting the car and lumbering thunderously toward the sausage factory on 8th Street. If seen, please offer him treats.

Look Closer

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This guy is a pioneer in self sufficient travel seating. No one can call him a slouch. Maybe the only way to ensure that you'll actually have a seat on your commute is to literally bring one with you!

If You Have a Plunger, Use it

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But of course, please wash before use. If you're unlike the man above, who brought a seat with him onto the subway, at least bring something to stabilize your ride that won't require you to touch the germ-ridden handles everyone else is using.

Dog Bag, Husky Edition

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Newest accessory from Eddie Bauer, this Husky bag holds everything you need. Computer, wallet, lunch and 1/6th of your sled team. You'll arrive in style but your sandwich may be mush.

Subway Adventures with Gandalf

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The legendary wizard of Middle-earth may be the last person you'd expect to ride on a midtown train, but it looks like he is absolutely comfortable and about to banish his companion to the underworld...

Quoth the Raven... Not Again!

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We've all seen this scene before, a pensive Goth with a severe middle part brooding on a crosstown train with a huge freaking raven on their lap... am I right?

Lost Costco Employee Gives Cheese to Wary Train Passengers

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She took the wrong train and didn't want the gruyere to spoil so, you might as well share what you've got with the rest of the passengers! Just like your mom always said, don't bring a snack if you can't share some with everybody.

Nap Nap

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Nice nice. It looks like there was a glitch in the matrix on this ride that caused a clone to appear. Whatever you do, don't wake one of them up without waking up the other or you could change the entire course of history forever!

Mighty Morphing Subway Rangers

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When their Megazord got booted in Queens, the heroes had to take the subway. But really, this is what it looks like when you take the metro in Japan on Halloween.

Witch Potato Dog

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Emotional service animals come in all shapes and sizes. Luckily in Japan, people are courteous enough to not crowd around the doors and give this hamster its personal space. This man is obviously living by his own rules. Bravo.

Your Nightmare Returns

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This time the nuns aren't feeding the poor, they're gonna eat your soul. Yikes! Luckily, the locals aren't even phased. As long as they're not eating kimchi on the train, nothing is a nuisance.

Social Distancing Options

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Bubble boy, meet... clown car man. His hermetically sealed environment is perfect for social distancing in a crowded subway, but if he's trying to lower his carbon emissions, riding two vehicles at the same time isn't the way to do it.

This Guy Loves the Subway

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Making out with a subway seat may not be the most hygienic activity but who am I to spoil a budding romance? Anyone who has that much confidence should be applauded for their complete lack of caring what other people think.

Lettuce or Cabbage?

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Haberdashers would like to know which leafy green this woman is wearing, because it could be seen on runways across the globe or at the Kentucky Derby in years to come!

Two Goths, One Train

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These goths are getting riled up. There's only enough space in the train for one brooding dark character with a heart wrenching backstory. But, come on guys, you obviously have a lot in common, so chill!

Apology Pizza

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Toppings include: lonely sausage, limp pepperoni, pathetic tears and of course... extra cheese. If she's willing to forgive you thanks to one pizza, she's a keeper.

Angel Falls to Earth, Takes Subway

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This middle aged cherub was spotted in Jersey last week serenading some unsuspecting mortals and bringing even newborn babies to tears. You never know who you could be sharing the subway with!

Wash Your Pet on the Go

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Pet washing has never been easier with this portable dog washer, just pop in your dirty pet and use the handy app to adjust the settings: heavy, delicate or tumble dry. Awww, doesn't he look clean and happy?

That’s Not a Book

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Trying to get me to believe a turkey is books is what 2020 is all about. This is obviously a scheme to get more people to visit local libraries instead of petting zoos. I just love literature about Thanksgiving.

Engrossed

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This lady loves reading so much that she doesn't even notice she's photobombing the ad on the back of her magazine. If she's not careful, she'll land herself on the cover next!

Dog Helps Bro

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A rather smug and self satisfied Husky directed his bro to tie his own shoes today on the Express train. That's a pretty good trick, human. I hope his dog gives him a cookie for a job well done.

Pikachu Vomits a Hand

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This is like seeing a unicorn in the wild, so please enjoy this moment. Any scared children seeing this image should rest assured that Pikachu is simply giving a small human friend a ride in his mouth.

A Devil Late For His Manicure

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Darn! The Devil has major cuticle over-growth. Get thee to the nail salon before you go visit your mom with those nasty things. Even demons need to be presentable when they see their parents.

Why So Friendly, Sailor?

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This baby on the subway has no money to tip this wandering sailor playing the violin, but she is probably thinking, "I hope he'll like these wet biscuits, instead." There's always some kind folks riding on the subway, you just have to look for them!

Scowling Woman, Hiding Feline

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For those pet parents who can't smuggle their little ones on the subway in a shopping bag, there's always the tried and true method of opting for a close snuggle instead. This kitty looks perfectly comfortable where it's at!

Albert Einstein Commutes

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He calculated light speed... but still uses public transportation. Unless he actually managed to successfully invent time travel while he was alive, and he chooses to still get around on the subway today.

Gutter Punk's Mum is a Real Helper

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She wanted to carry the heavy one. I told her I'd carry it. She's so hardcore. A right proper mum, but she was never much of a groupie. Next time set down the drink and get both boxes, son.

Déjà View

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He is the poster man of business management, or so he seems to be. Hilariously enough, the man in the advertisement is not the same man who is getting his photo taken with the ad. But they might be long-lost cousins.

Plastic Army Man Escapes

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A plastic army man escaped a horrible child who was trying to melt him with a magnifying glass today. Hopefully he finds his plastic platoon and returns to his base to continue serving his plastic country.

Subtle

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Obviously this man is in need of some relationship help. My question is does he read "How to Meet Women in the Park" at the park or "How to Meet Women on an Airplane" in an airplane? How many books are in this series?

Tall Tomato Seeks Thinly Sliced Meat

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His quest to find love and get in the middle of a hot sandwich is all that consumes this tangy fruit's waking hours. Without some bacon and lettuce by his side, what's the point of it all anyways?

Looking for a Horse?

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This well dressed man was seen horseless and somber, with only his delicately wrapped gift to keep him company on his long journey. I hope he finds his steed and gets to the derby on time!

Man Sulking Without Robot Suit

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When you have to do your normal human stuff without the help of your billion dollar robotic suit, life seems kinda boring. And when you just look like Robert Downey, Jr. but you don't have his money, riding the subway isn't as fun.

The Post Said "Join Us for a Normal White Guy Flash Mob"

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So he went. And on the way he met (at least) two other men wearing the same classic fit plaid Gap shirt as him. That's how you know that you'll really fit in at that next board meeting!

The Knight of 42nd Street

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He is definitely looking for the grail but will absolutely settle for a light beer. Chivalry really must be dead if he gets looks like that from women on the train, but he probably stole her seat anyways.

These Darn Things!

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My grandpa invented air pod sport mode. If you have trouble with your AirPods falling out, and don't really care if young people will gawk at your fashion faux pas, this life hack could save you the couple hundred dollars it would take to replace your headphones if you lost them.