Though Adam Stalmach’s antics on Wednesday landed him in handcuffs, they also landed him in the Streaker Hall of Fame, a distinction he earned with almost unmatched longevity in the running-naked-at-a-sporting-event game—because he lasted a whole five minutes before his being brought down at golf’s Waste Management Phoenix Open.
Before the 24-year-old was escorted away, he managed to practice his golf swing (in the absence of a club, he substituted his genitals), breakdance, throw sand, and fall down, a lot.
— Seth Norris (@sethnorris) January 31, 2018
— Jim McKiernan (@JimmyMack66) January 31, 2018
— Jason Snavely (@JasonSnavely) January 31, 2018
— Jay Blasi (@jayblasi) January 31, 2018
Real-life footage of one golfer’s reaction:
— Shane Dale (@ShaneDaleABC15) January 31, 2018
As a result of Stalmach’s jaunt at the Phoenix Open, he’s facing charges of indecent exposure and disorderly conduct, according to AZCentral.com.
“Stalmach showed signs and symptoms of alcohol intoxication,” said Scottsdale police’s Sgt. Ben Hoster, to the surprise of exactly zero people.